Resolutions, '09 Edition: Things at which I will inevitably fail

I don't recall the last time I had a list of concrete new year's resolutions (that I was not required to create in class. It's been a long, long time.) So in no particular order (and ranging from the practical to the sublime and possibly ridiculous):

THINGS I WILL FORGET TO DO BY MID-FEBRUARY:

1. Institute actual workout regime.
I go to the gym, run a little, stretch, dick around on machines and then leave. Yes I have lost some weight and toned up some but I've no earthly idea what I'm doing. This also may include taking a couple dance classes.

2. Write more. I'm legitimately worried that I've become the woman in Raymond Chandler's "Cathedral" who only sits down to write a poem every two or three years when shit gets inexplicably real. I have both a copy of the 2009 Poet's Market and a Magnetic Poetry calender. Also two Moleskines and a pen at the ready. And shit has recently become increasingly tangible. I have no substantive excuse.

3. Become the kind of woman who can pull off red lipstick and Chanel No.5 without seeming like a possibly trashy septuagenarian.

4. Be irrepressibly scholarly. I'd like to be able to discuss the post-structuralists on a substantive level (not just ending a pithy comments about what deconstruction isn't.)

5. Only buy clothing that makes me want to dance. This applies to gym clothes, fun clothes, going out clothes, ladies nights regalia, work attire, shoes, etc., etc., etc... This will cut down on the money I actually spend on clothing and hopefully also eliminate last minute wardrobe disasters.

6. Travel abroad at least once. I have a passport that is stampless and pathetic. It could do with some sprucing up.

7. Do well at Mason.

8. Save money for a spiffy new computer.

9. Develop charming idiosyncrasies that amuse people at parties.

10. Generally carry myself like a brave, little toaster.

11. Find the perfect little black dress. I do not own a little (or big for that matter) black dress. This is a travesty and must be remedied.

12. Get organized. My bookshelf is in disarray and my closet is full of clothing that goes unworn. It's giving me hives.

13. Be admired from afar (this does not preclude the possibility of affairs with solvent but lonely gentleman who love me for my mind and lavish me with fancy shoes and Amethyst rings). I have too much stuff on this list (and far too much ambition) to worry about menfolk.